if only I were Catholic

WARNING: PHOTO-HEAVY POST!


This is a confession. I'm much better than I used to be about starting things and not finishing them. But I've been letting things pile up lately, and I've started to feel really guilty about it because, well, there are BABIES coming, people!!! Three of my friends are having babies in the pretty-near future and those babies need BOOTIES and SWEATERS and all kinds of cute things. And frankly, who doesn't love knitting for babies, because they're so little they wear very. little. clothes. And there is a child who is TWO YEARS OLD that I have yet to knit for. I know, I know. I'm a terrible person. So I figure, by letting everyone on the internet know how many projects I've let pile up maybe I'll be motivated to finish them.


Also, I say I'm a lot better than I used to be because I no longer feel the need to finish things that I hate. I tear them out now, and I get a sickly gleeful about it because I can figure out a way to put that yarn to better use. It's really creepy. I giggle psychotically the whole time.


So here we go:





This is where the UFOs live... This photo (with cold unforgiving light courtesy of amazing Chicagoland weather - looks like things are shaping up for a thunderstorm now - great) looks like some creepy Dutch still-life or something. (Sorry for exhibiting my horrible understanding of art, Jenny!)


Let's take a look inside...


First up, and I won't bore you with more photographs and babbling, is that Rusted Root sweater of my last post.





This guy has an interesting story. The yarn is Lion Brand Wool Ease Thick-and-Quick in Wheat, 86% acrylic, 10% wool, 4% rayon. I originally bought this to make the poncho in Deb Stoller's first book (gee, I would put the title here, but I don't want to get sued by that asshole company that will remain nameless that made everyone stop using that name). Anyway, I just didn't like the poncho and was never wearing it and I thought it was taking up a whole lot of room in my closet for something I never wore, so I frogged it. Then I tried to knit the Bulky Cabled Sweater of Glampyre Knits, and it just wasn't working out. Gague was fine and all, but the more I struggled through it, the more I realized I just didn't like knitting it. That sweater should take two seconds it's so bulky, and I'm not sure if it was the bulky yarn, bulky needles, or having to pay attention to the cable pattern or what, but I HATED it. So I frogged that, too. It's too bad, because the pattern is cute, but it just wasn't going to work on me (it was clearly going to add 20 lbs).


Also, somewhere along the line I noticed that the yarn kind of looks like off-white yarn that has tons and tons of pubes stuck to it. Seriously. And I can't wear something that looks like it's covered in pubes. But I figured I HAVE to use this yarn for SOMETHING, so I started making a really simple garter stitch rug out of it, and that's what you see here. When this is done I think it'll be really nice. Super washable, I won't be bothered by the quasi-pube factor since it'll be on the floor and not near my face, and it'll feel so nice and squishy under my feet. Great for the bedroom, I think.





And here we have a knit that is a true pain in the ass to photograph! That shiny black thread (yarn? or thread. who knows.) with super-shiny beads. There's NO. WAY. to distinguish those stitches!





Yeah, it just always looks like it's glowing. It just loves the camera, I guess.


This is MaryElla from Knitty. My mom knit me one of these (I think it was for my birthday?) a few years ago and I think it's just the coolest thing! I never would have picked that pattern out on my own, just because it never occurs to me to knit jewelry, but it is just so cute, and it turns out knitting with beads is fun as all get out! I love it. That's DMC Perle cotton there, folks, on US0000 needles. Yikes! This one would get done faster, but it really puts a lot of pressure on my joints to knit on those tiny needles, so I can only do a little bit at a time. Also, there's no way I'm taking those terrifying needles on an airplane. Ever. They'd get taken away in two seconds they look so scary.





And here we have something I'd really like to get done soon, but it's just not going to happen immediately. I mean, it's a sweater on size US3 needles for Christ's sake. This is the Union Square Market Pullover (if you follow that link, it's the one on the cover) by the fabulous Kate Gilbert in Misti Alpaca Worsted. This sweater is going to be so nice and cozy, yet pretty, when I finally finish it. I loved working the hemmed bottom - really smart design there!





Yes, we've all seen these. These are Grumperina's Jaywalkers for Ali in Blue Moon Fiber Arts Sock Candy.


This yarn is so squishy and wonderful, I seriously MUST go out and buy more immediately after I send these socks away. And the name is hilarious: Sock Candy? Disgusting and adorable in a very special way. The pattern is so fun and easy! I'm planning on making a tiny pair for my favorite 2 year old after I'm done with these, which will be very soon.





But Lauren, you say, that isn't even a project - that's just a pile of blue yarn!


And that it is. But it's my biggest guilty confession of them all. When my grandmother died last year the family encouraged my mother and I to take as much of her crafting materials as we could fit into our suitcases (they even shipped me some, so I have boxes of yarn AT MY PARENTS' HOUSE - how sad is that). This is some German wool that looks like it originally was for one of her knitting machines (I think they've found 3 so far while cleaning out her house, but God only knows how many more there might be). It's nice stuff, and it feels like it could be superwash, but I need to figure out the German word for that, because the label doesn't have any English on it. At any rate, I have this stuff sitting in my UFO basket in the living room because I keep thinking I'll start this project. What I want to do is knit a lap blanket for my dad. He likes lap blankets a lot, and having one made with his mom's yarn by his daughter is the kind of thing that would really make him tear up. My dad is the kind of guy that appreciates objects of everyday use that carry deep personal (particularly familial) meaning. He's a good guy. Very Yankee. He wants precious objects, but he wants them to have some kind of use. And thus, a lap blanket is perfect for him. I'm planning on using some big, fat Addis that I borrowed from my mom - she had them to make me a blanket a while back. I'm also going to copy the pattern mom used - it's just a simple basket-weave. I think it's the best way to make a blanket in only one color and have it be interesting.






So, I guess that's that. At least one of these - the Jaywalker socks - will be done very, very soon... I suppose that's six projects total. If you count the blue blanket...